“Dazed & Confused”
How a Head Injury Changed My Life
Imagine having a head injury that took away your capacity to remember day to day events. Imagine waking up and not knowing what happened yesterday while having a much less fuzzy recollection of things that happened years ago. Imagine waking up and reading the sticky notes and papers that are taped to your wall before leaving your bedroom in order to understand the world you are about to face; the people who are close to you, healthcare professional appointments. Imagine social emptiness.
This is the story of one young adult, as written in his poem below. After suffering a major head injury, life was altered irreparably.
I draw blood everyday
so I am very familiar with its stain
Now I need to read the whole manual
first before I will try any new GAME.
So now I need to learn more than a new language
in order, just to fix my FRAME.
But then I see the wall marks, to remind myself
that to learn my new stuff or meet any new ones,
requires a new one.
So whose sum?
Others must remind me that I am a new some,
who is now without sum,
in which resulted in me now having to take a few some
in order just to process some or one.
So now I find that the ones experiencing similar,
are those obese anorexics on the constant ketchup,
breakfast, Lunch and Dinner.
Lost myself, after Falling like timber.
Left-over broken and incomplete.
Most would have cowardess in defeat.
But as my thoughts were echoed
and I tried to fix myself
my emotion was let go.
So I am now left in despair,
trying to understand myself
just through the reflection in the mirror.
Be thankful for the memories you have, the good and the bad, for they give us our identity, our sense of belongingness and connection in the world. Our ability to remember allows each one of us to know just enough to build upon day by day, to grow and develop, to learn and improve. Hopefully we use our memories well.