Entry #3 of 3)  Step-parents are often both “easy targets” for blame and extra stressed in their attempt to join with others in the family who already have well-established relationship bonds. This dynamic, along with past conflict resolution patterns, can make it rather challenging to adjust after separation and remarriage. Excessive silences can be just as detrimental to a relationship as angry outbursts. In today’s third post in the series, we hear from the wife/step-mom, a self-proclaimed “rage-rageaholic she identifies her husband’s contribution…

“I’m married to a silent rage-aholic.  He would rather avoid the problem or sweep it under the rug when in an argument, hoping it will all blow over.  In fact, all it does is make it worse!  When you don’t talk things out or at least try, it makes the other person angrier and feels alone.  How many people out there understand or know what I’m experiencing?
                                                 Wife/Step-mom

Blaming one another only intensifies and extends the problem as our energies are now invested in misdirected ways. We are shifting our perspective away from the other and toward the couple as a team, which is critical to find solutions together. Working through the stresses involved with separation, divorce, and remarriage is a complicated process, one that we hope we don’t go through often.  Because of limited experience, it can be pretty helpful to seek out professional coaching.

Our Oshawa counsellors teach effective coping strategies, increase and strengthen your interpersonal skills and help you stop hurtful conflict by increasing calm and successful problem-solving.

Relationships are constructed one sentence, action or facial expression at a time.

The more we can increase our ability to display loving expression with words, face and tone, we will build healthier and more satisfying relationships.Painted heart