So many people make this decision far too quickly and with minimal or biased information.  After working in the counselling field for over twenty years, I have grown increasingly “pro family.” We often hear the following two main thoughts about separating “I might as well leave and be happy” or “If I stay, we’ll only fight and be miserable.”  That negative voice in the back of our heads doesn’t want us to think about the other possibilities. “I could leave and be miserable still” or “I could actually stay and work out things so we’re a happier couple/ family.” What happened to those options?

What can you do about it? We can do many things to change ourselves, thereby changing those around us (Social Systems Theory). We receive ongoing training to be great at our careers, hobbies and sometimes even get trainers/coaches for great physical fitness and sports. Great relationships are constructed over time and with plenty of effort.  How about getting coaching to improve mental fitness and great relationships. Numerous books and professional counsellors can help you assess your relationship and achieve your goals.

Before making any major life-changing decisions, get accurate and objective information about your options.  Share what you want to achieve in a relationship. We will draw upon your strengths in the training and effort required to negotiate issues better, problem-solve more quickly and communicate concerns more effectively, so you and your partner can have a satisfying, magnificent romance and family.

In a close interpersonal relationship, it is expected that you sometimes are not seeing eye to eye and not feeling able to manage these conflicts. Emotional intensity and the value inherent in romantic relationships often make way for heated conflicts. High conflict dynamics are changeable habits with intensional effort and support ( reading, coaching, and your mate’s agreement to work on improving). This video offers a few strategies to retrain our bodies and minds to do conflict better.